by Mark Pitstick MA, DC
How can you optimally HEAL after tough changes, LIVE the greatest life you have envisioned, and HELP
others and our world? The Greater Reality Healing, Living & Helping Program can help you do just that!
How to join these FREE meetings? Click here Greater Reality Meeting link or use this Zoom meeting # to join: 329 383 1916
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This program is designed to help you . . .
- realize your true nature as an eternal being of consciousness / life-force / energy
- use guidance and assistance from angels / highly evolved energies and The Light
- heal old wounds, upgrade past misinformation, and release needless fears
- learn to find, benefit from, and share the silver linings that accompany adversity
- create the greatest life YOU have envisioned (YOU = your soul / higher self)
- help others by sharing your greatest gifts and making our world a better place
To learn more about how you achieve these goals, read the following articles at GRI Library AND watch videos at Greater Reality Programs.
#131 Greater Reality Healing, Living & Helping Program with videos Greater Reality Program
#82 Greater Reality HEALING with videos at Greater Reality Healing
#72 Greater Reality LIVING with videos at Greater Reality Living
#119 Greater Reality HELPING with videos at Greater Reality Helping
#19 The Great News about the Nature of Reality
#125 Eight Developments for Widespread Conscious Living Now
Thank you for sharing this program with your family, friends, email lists, and on social media. Your action steps create ripples that can help humanity reach higher levels of peace, joy, love, and higher consciousness living.
Note: my e-books, audio books, audio programs, documentary film, radio shows, articles, and ‘Greater Reality Healing, Living & Helping Program’ are all FREE at GRI Library. In lieu of payment, I ask that you fully use the products, share them, and help others as you feel called.
Greater Reality HEALING: A Higher-Energy Path After Life’s Toughest Changes
Introduction
Special thanks to the Helping Parents Heal (HPH) organization for creating stellar ways to heal, transform, and help
others after a child passes on. And kudos to those who kept asking me ‘Are there any HPH-like organizations for
those who are grieving a spouse, sibling, friend, pet, or other loved one?’
The bodily death of a beloved person or pet can be one of the most difficult changes in an earthly experience. Other changes – for example, involving finances, health, relationship break-ups, loved ones with mental illness and/or addiction issues – can also be very challenging. When two or more of these occur in a short period of time, it’s common to feel overwhelmed. This program primarily addresses grief after loved ones pass on, but it can also help you optimally handle any big change in life. (Note: I use the term ‘change’ instead of ‘loss’ for reasons you’ll learn in this article.)
After what seem like losses, some people FEEL lower energy emotions such as sadness, guilt, anger, despair, and/or suicidal thoughts. In an attempt to cope, some may CHOOSE lower energy actions: excess alcohol and drug use, sexual infidelity or promiscuity, hurting themselves or others, self-neglect, and isolation.
I am not judging or criticizing these attempts to handle the pain and despair that can occur after major life changes. After major changes / losses in my life, I felt those lower energy emotions – including brief suicidal thoughts – and made some of those poor choices. That’s one reason I can help others so powerfully now. I learned about the importance of focusing on higher energy feelings and choices. This helped me find the silver linings to improve my life and share with others.
Because of those lessons that made me wiser and stronger, I can now clearly see how wonderfully life is set up even when it doesn’t seem like it. During that time, I . . .
- worked in two hospitals part-time as a respiratory therapy technician; I was around many people – adults and children – as they passed on
- attended theology school and provided pastoral counseling at a psychiatric hospital, juvenile detention center, and suicide prevention center
- worked in two mental health centers as a master level clinical psychologist
- provided holistic health care as a chiropractic physician at my clinics for 35 years
- wrote 8 books and created 10 transformation audio products
- produced the Soul Proof documentary film (now available at no charge) and hosted two radio shows on afterlife evidence and practical spirituality
- gave hundreds of presentations at churches, expos, and holistic health conferences
Visit SoulProof.com/About to learn about my training, experience, outreaches, and products and services. I share all this to let you know that you are in good hands. My goal is to help you realize how very safe and precious this earthly experience is. The Greater Reality Healing Program can help you know and show this relatively quickly and easily. You don’t have to spend 50 years reading hundreds of books, attending many conferences, and learning the hard way like I did.
Note: My e-books, audio books, audio programs, documentary film, articles, radio shows, and ‘Greater Reality Healing, Living & Helping Program’ are all FREE at GRI Library. In lieu of payment, I ask that you fully use the products, share them, and help others as you feel called.
Feeling lower energy emotions somewhat for a while is normal. However, you don’t have to suffer intensely for a long time. You also don’t have to choose grief-driven actions that make things worse. To be clear, different people grieve in various ways as they encounter change. While acknowledging and honoring that, this program invites you to consider a different way to respond to big changes during this earthly experience
The Greater Reality Healing Program provides evidence-based information and holistic resources so you can handle all changes with style. The keys shared below, when used consistently over time, can help you heal more quickly and fully than you might imagine. What’s more, this approach can positively transform every aspect of your life. This may sound impossible, especially if you are deeply and/or freshly grieving right now, but it’s true.
Many people have remarkably transformed – not despite, but because of – tough changes that seemed likecruel and senseless tragedies. They had multiple loved ones pass on, were paralyzed, raped, blind, struggling with several diseases, etc. And, yet, they were able to find more peace, enthusiasm, and awareness. They focused beyond their personal suffering by lovingly serving others and making our world a better place.
If they can do it, you can too. This program will show you how. It may not be easy or happen overnight, but it is possible.
The term ‘greater reality’ describes the totality of life and all that actually exists. Synonyms include the big picture of life, how life is really set up, and the true nature of reality. These terms convey the scientific fact that your brain and five senses detect only a very small fraction of life. A metaphor for this comes from top quantum physicists interviewed in Lynne McTaggart’s book The Field.
In my words: In reality, humans are not solid people who are separate from others and The Source, and who will die someday. It just appears that way due to: (a) myopic perceptions of limited brains and sense organs, and (b) societal teachings that indoctrinate people into thinking they are ‘only human’. From a physics perspective, energy, light, and information are the most accurate terms for what you and your loved ones are really composed of. If all that in our world were the size of Mt. Everest, the portion that can be sensed by the average person would be the size of a golf ball. Another comparison is: if all that really exists in our world were the height of the Empire State Building, the portion that can be perceived by most people is only the height of a coat of paint.
That explains a lot, doesn’t it? It means that most people are looking at life as though through a tiny pinhole. No wonder they believe that life is horribly tragic, unfair, and chaotic when changes like bodily death occur. Fortunately, you can expand your awareness and understandings about the nature of reality. As you do, you’ll realize just how safely, fairly, and beautifully life is set up.
The term ‘greater reality healing‘ invites you to consider how you will respond to life’s biggest changes when you know ‘The Great News’ About the Nature of Reality as discussed in article The ten statements on this list are based on scientific, clinical, and experiential evidence. Gary E. Schwartz PhD – former professor at Harvard, Yale, and recently retired from the University of Arizona – and I compiled this list while writing our book Greater Reality Living. We also wrote The Big Picture of Life, a similar book for ages 10 – 16, with Katta Mapes MA, MEd.
‘The Great News’ is that you and everyone else . . .
- are beings of consciousness / energy who live after your earthly body dies.
- can continue relationships with ‘deceased’ loved ones.
- are integral, eternal, and beloved parts of Source Energy / The Light now.
- receive guidance, assistance, and love from angels, guides, and master teachers.
- are sacredly interconnected with all people, animals, and nature.
- have special purposes for being on earth at this time.
- may simultaneously manifest in other space-time realities now and after death.
- have everything you need – no matter what your past or current circumstances – to enjoy the greatest life YOU have envisioned. (YOU = your higher self / soul)
- can find peace, joy, meaning, growth, and opportunities for loving service amidst your toughest changes and challenges.
- create the quality of your life – whether experiencing that on earth or beyond – via your predominant thoughts, words and actions.
Further, you will quite likely be able to use SoulPhone technology someday to communicate with ‘deceased’ loved ones and luminaries who can help you, others, and our world.
Very high degrees of certainty exist for ‘The Great News’ . . .
- Statement #1 and #2 are based on scientific research at the University of Arizona. These experiments involve standard scientific methodology with controlled, blinded, replicated, and multi-center studies published in peer-reviewed scientific journals.
- Statement #2 in ‘The Great News’ is also based on double-blinded laboratory research at five universities and institutes with results published in scientific journals.
- Statements #3 – 10 are based on clinical research by physicians, psychologists, and / or university professors. They evaluate data from near-death experiences, past life memories, perinatal experiences, life between lives input, shared death experiences, terminal lucidity, and deathbed visions.
- In addition, experiential evidence – although not validated like scientific and clinical data – adds further validity about statements #1 – 10. This category of evidence includes afterlife contacts, out-of-body experiences, electronic voice phenomena / instrumental transcommunication, and other firsthand experiences.
Knowing ‘The Great News’ and living accordingly – whatever that means for you – is an integral part of the Greater Reality Healing Program. The more you learn about the big picture of life, the more you KNOW thatthis earthly experience is a totally safe, meaningful, and magnificent adventure amidst forever.
Near the end of his earthly experience, Buckminster Fuller – the legendary architect, inventor, philosopher, and futurist – was asked ‘What is the most important message you would like to share with others?’ He paused and said, ‘The Universe is friendly.’
Armed with this wisdom about how marvelously life is set up, you can increasingly – no matter what is happening to or around you – FOCUS ON HIGHER ENERGY FEELINGS of peace, joy, love, hope, gratitude, and fulfillment. You also – even amidst tough times – can CHOOSE OPTIMAL ACTIONS of self-care, fulfilling relationships, meaningful lifework, serving others, and loving activism.
And, big take-away alert, you can begin to do that even though you are still feeling sad, angry, guilty, fearful, hopeless, etc. Just take the first few steps in this program. Are you ready?
(Please don’t feel overwhelmed by all the information and resources in this program. Just learn and take action steps at your own pace.)
Note #1: This article is intended as a reference source, not to replace professional treatment for physical, emotional, or mental problems. The author disclaims any liability arising directly or indirectly from the voluntary use of action steps discussed in article. I created this article while ‘wearing the hat’ of a clinician, counselor, and educator. My statements are based upon some scientific data, clinical studies, experiential evidence, my personal experiences, and best current understandings. This program does not reflect my roles with the SoulPhone Project since those require more scientific data for all statements.
Note #2: This is, by necessity, a long article since it addresses how to optimally heal and transform after any kind of big change and challenge. Feel free to skim the 18 keys below and focus on those most relevant for you.
Note #3: My FREE evidence-based information and holistic resources to assist your journey FROM deeply grieving and struggling TO brightly shining include:
* GRI Library for 130 articles on the most commonly asked topics
* GRI Library for 25 interviews with experts on the afterlife and optimal living
* GRI Library for 8 e-books, 10 audio programs, and my documentary film
* GRI Library and SoulPhone.org to sign up for monthly newsletters
* The HelpingParentsHeal.org website contains many powerful free resources for parents and family members with a child who changed worlds. Visit their Resources / Shining Light Resources page for an overview.
Brian Smith’s Grief2Growth.com website is another excellent resource for those seeking a higher path to handling grief.
Keys to Journeying FROM Deeply Grieving TO Brightly Shining
Key #1: Use Conscious Language
Your words shape how you think and what you believe. And that, in turn, affects how you feel and act. That’s why it’s so important to use more accurate terms while thinking, speaking, and writing. For example, consider the power of a term that I hope will soon gain widespread use. Currently, most health caregivers – even those in hospice – use the term ‘end-of-life’. You now appreciate why ‘end-of-this-life’ is much more accurate and reassuring.
Upgrading your language can also help you optimally detect signs from your dear ones who graduated from earth school. Here’s my understanding of how that works . . . your dear ones who have passed on now live in realms characterized by higher energies of peace, joy, love, and gratitude. If you are overly focused on lower energy emotions, you’re on a different frequency from them. It’s as though they are transmitting and receivingon FM 111 while you’re trying to do the same on AM 87. You can better receive / detect their signs and living presence when you’re on a similar wavelength. Conversely, you can more effectively transmit / send from a place of higher energy emotions.
I often receive messages that start like this: ‘I’m desperately trying to contact my husband who passed on. I am so afraid that he can’t hear me. This keeps me feeling anxious all day and I can’t sleep. What can I do?’ Can you see how her feelings of desperation, fear, and anxiety prevent clear communication with her loved one who is now living in a higher dimension?
I’m not at all criticizing or making light of these messages. I understand that is how they are feeling right now. However, as you are learning, you can modify what feelings you focus on. And you can choose to think, speak, and act in higher energy ways.
Using language based on contemporary evidence-based information – instead of archaic fear-based beliefs – is a big step in healing and positively transforming. Some people say just this one shift helped them more deeply know that their loved ones are alive, well, and near. Start with a few language shifts to increasingly identify with your timeless aspect and that of your loved ones. For example, when someone asks ‘How old are you?’ I say ‘That depends on which “you” you’re referring to. This earthly body is 71 years old, but my real self is ageless.’
A few comments about the following words . . .
- death: Despite the vast amount of evidence that life continues seamlessly after the body perishes, this term is still strongly anchored to the cessation of life. That’s why I recommend using other terms that more accurately describe what really happens. These include pass on, change worlds, transition, cross over, and graduate from earth-school. Using modifiers with the word ‘death’ can help, for example, bodily death, death of his human form, and death of her earth-suit. These terms might be cumbersome at first but the benefits are worth it.
- seem and appear: As discussed, your brain and five senses detect much less than 1% of reality. As such, how things seem and appear often isn’t accurate. As the old saying goes ‘There is more to life than meets the eye.’ For example, loved ones who have passed on may seem to be ‘dead and gone’ when, in fact, they are very much alive and nearby. In 2008, I and Andrea Lee – RN, Doctor of Acupuncture, and evidential medium – created the Soul Proof A Spiritualist minister we interviewed said: ‘I went to a funeral where the family was crying around the casket and saying how much they will miss him. And I’m across the room talking to the guy.’
- lost: I don’t use this word, except with single quotation marks, to describe what happens when a loved one passes on. Why? You can’t really ‘lose’ a loved one for several reasons. First, life and love are eternal components of reality so beloved people and pets are never ‘lost’. The information, energy, and light that can manifest as earthly experiences and other ways are stored in space / the zero point field / the Akashic records. Finally, as discussed in article you and your loved ones might be together right now in a simultaneous reality.
- earthly experience: I use this instead of ‘life’ because earthly experiences are very brief while life is forever. This term also reminds you that this human incarnation is only relatively real. That is, what seems to be happening is shaped by your dual brain-based and transcendent source of consciousness. How this earthly experience appears to manifest depends on the intentions, level of awareness, and observation point of your total being. (Don’t worry if this doesn’t make sense yet. I’ll say more later.)
- postmaterial person: Formulated by Dr. Schwartz and I, this term describes people who used to live on earth but now are in a different space-time slice of life / dimension / frequency. As the term implies, those who have changed worlds still have physicality, or can have depending on their goals. They retain their humanity, memories, intelligence, preferences, love, sense of humor, areas of mastery, and much more. In short, everything about them except their prior earthly body still exists. The acronym for postmaterial person is PMP.
- ‘the afterlife’: This word has well-established but varying meanings for many people. A common one is that of an eternal heaven and hell. Another is a nebulous realm where spirits / energies wispily float around. As discussed in Key #8, the afterlife experience isn’t ‘one size fits all’. As such, I’ll use single quotation marks around the noun form ‘the afterlife’, but not adjective use such as afterlife contacts.
The Shining Light Parents Speak book shares ‘the best of’ interviews with 130 amazing parents with one or more children who passed on. I highly recommend it and the Conscious Language chapter for all people with loved ones – not just children – who have changed worlds. These interviews can be watched at Affiliate Leader / Caring Listener Interviews on the HelpingParentsHeal.org website.
Article Terms for Optimally Living on Earth and Beyond lists more accurate words.
Suggested Action Steps
- Post a list of four words you want to update where you’ll see it often
- Ask three close people to gently remind you if you say those words (this will also help them upgrade their vocabulary and, thus, understandings about the nature of reality)
- Read article for additional words when you’ve incorporated the first four into your everyday language
To learn more about conscious language, see articles:
#31 What Is a Postmaterial Person?
#75 Multilocation / Parallel Realities / Simultaneous Experiences
#116 Terms for Optimally Living on Earth and Beyond
Key #2: Internalize ‘The Great News’
I emphasize ‘The Great News’ because it’s so foundational for this program. I recommend printing the list on page 4 above and reading it daily. This will help you move beyond mere intellectual beliefs to deeply internalized knowledge about how wonderfully life is set up. (Chapter 2 in our book Greater Reality Livingshares practical ways to do this.)
In the past, you may have suffered needlessly because of archaic misinformation propagated by ultra-powerful political and church rulers. Original teachings based on firsthand experiences and enlightened understandings may have been accurate. However, history clearly shows those have been mightily changed over time via additions, deletions, transcription errors, and mistranslations. You can now confidently focus on more contemporary and accurate understandings about the nature of reality.
Many people understandably have questions about life, death, and the afterlife. They may think, especially if they have been abused or suffered deeply, that ‘The Great News’ sounds too good to be true. I answer many of these questions in my:
* Ask the Soul Doctor book with answers to the 171 most commonly asked ones
* 121 articles at GRI Library(scan titles to find ones that address your biggest questions and toughest challenges)
* The Eleven Questions book with my answers and those of eleven experts to existential questions ‘Who am I? Why am I here? What happens after I die?’ and others
Old wounds from past abuse can block you from really knowing ‘The Great News’ and living accordingly. A powerful way to release these wounds is with my Holistic Breathing Technique audio program. I’ve led thousands of people in group sessions and have seen amazingly rapid and profound healings. This technique also helps you release layers of deep grief, needless fears, and past misinformation.
The Love, Acceptance, and Forgiveness (LAF) technique helps you achieve just what the title says. You can do this no matter how much others have physically, emotionally, mentally, and/or sexually abused you. This approach doesn’t require you to condone their behavior, nor does it negate seeking legal justice. Further, you don’t need to have a relationship with them on earth or in the next phase of life. However, you suffer the most when you hang on to the past and accompanying lower energy emotions. Start now to release the past so your present and future become outstanding.
It’s also important to love, accept, and forgive yourself since people are often so critical of themselves and get stuck in self-blame, shame, and guilt. One of my mottos is: ‘Everyone is doing the best they can given their level of consciousness.’ No one benefits when you blame yourself for what you should have, would have, or could have done in the past. Looking back has the benefit of 20/20 vision, but it’s not always so clear when you’re in the thick of things.
There’s a long list of things I would do differently if I had known then what I do now. Honor, learn from, and be grateful for your past despite sometimes missing the mark. (‘Missing the mark’ was an original translation in the Aramaic language for the word ‘sin’.) At times, all of us fall down and make mistakes. What’s most important is to repent: acknowledge your mistakes, apologize, make amends, and do better in the future. The LAF technique helps you do this and, in the process, more deeply internalize ‘The Great News’.
Those who abused you may be beginner souls who are just learning their way around the block. Michael Newton PhD, author of Journey of Souls and Destiny of Souls, and his trained therapists have conducted nearly 60,000 Life Between Lives sessions with deeply hypnotized clients. This clinical data provides clear indications of what it’s like before coming to earth. Based on this data, Newton estimates that about 85% of people on earth at this time are beginner souls. When I first read this statistic, I thought ‘Well, that explains a lot of things about humans!’
Souls / people with intermediate to advanced levels of energy / consciousness may volunteer – out of love –to be abused to help less evolved souls learn how NOT to be. This may sound like crazy talk, especially if you are deeply grieving and suffering now. Just consider, however, the perspective of people who deeply know ‘The Great News’ and have lived accordingly. They know it’s well worth while to suffer a bit to help others awaken to their true nature.
Article about contrast souls helps you also consider the possibility that your abuser(s) are actually soulmates fulfilling roles that YOU asked them to do. You may be thinking ‘Why in the world would I do that?’ The short answer is that adversity can strengthen spiritual muscles and enable you to grow, learn, and serve others at higher levels. While planning your upcoming earthly experience, you knew about the big picture of life. As such, there was no concern about difficulties, loss, failure, or bodily death.
The more clear and heightened your consciousness is, the more obvious ‘The Great News’ will be. That’s why it’s so important to find answers to your biggest questions, heal old wounds, and love, accept, and forgive yourself and others. Part of this process is to better understand the greater reality, the big picture of life, in which you live. Another is to engage in greater reality living: remembering every moment that you are an eternal and integral part of All That Is.
Suggested action steps . . .
- talk with trusted family, friends, and counselors to release blocks to internalizing ‘The Great News’
- Use the Holistic Breathing Technique and Love, Acceptance, and Forgiveness technique for the reasons explained above to ‘get more clear’ about the big picture of life
- Use other tips in this article, centering practices for example, to let go off old lower energy thoughts and beliefs
To learn more about internalizing ‘The Great News’, read articles:
#19 ‘The Great News’
#40 Love, Acceptance, and Forgiveness Technique
#67 Contrast Souls
#70 Holistic Breathing Technique
#98 Life Between Lives
Key #3: Grieve Your Own Way
Give yourself permission to mourn in ways that feel right to you. Listen to your inner voice about how to proceed AND know that help is available if you need it. Others might say to you: ‘You should be over this by now’, ‘Just get another puppy’, or ‘It’s time to find someone else.’ But the process varies for different people. You may still grieve the bodily death of your dear ones even though you know they are around ‘in spirit’. This program can lighten and abbreviate your grieving.
My dad Bill Pitstick and I were very close. After his human form died, I hugged it and cried long, loud, and hard. (Conscious language alert: I didn’t say ‘I hugged him’ because I didn’t hug dad, just his cast-off earthly overcoat. His energy / soul, or most of it, was already off to greener pastures by then. Also, notice my wording ‘after his human form died’. I didn’t say ‘after he died’ because 99.99% of who and what he IS, not was, didn’t die. That’s such a crucial point that I’ll emphasize it repeatedly.)
That was a very primal release after ‘losing’ my dear father and best friend. However – at the same time – I also felt relief that he was no longer suffering and was becoming healthy and whole again. I also felt happy that I would see him again someday and looked forward to getting signs and visits.
I had never before felt such contrasting emotions of deep sadness and, simultaneously, relief and happiness. At first, I was puzzled but soon realized: societal programming based on the fear of death and change had taught me it had to be one or the other . . . happy or sad. But that’s not true. Now, you may say ‘That’s great Mark, but your dad was 80 years ago and suffering greatly from leukemia. However, my loved one was young and healthy . . . how am I supposed to feel peace and joy over that tragedy?’
Again, reaching this level of awareness usually isn’t easy or overnight. However, some bereaved parents – especially those who detected clear signs and visits from their postmaterial children – have awakened very quickly.
I saw amazing demonstrations of this at the 2024 Helping Parents Heal conference attended by over 1100 parents with one or more children who had passed. There was some sadness and longing for the physical contact, but there was also lots of real joy and peace that their kids were alive and well. Their resolve to find and share the silver linings – to create more meaning and make their kids proud of them – gave me renewed hope for humanity.
These parents chose to take the high road and focus on positive expectancy of getting signs from their beloved children. In addition, they were energized about seeing their kids again after they passed on. During the conference, several non-attendees saw all the hugging, laughter, and comaraderie. They said ‘Wow, what a great gathering! How can I get invited to this group?’ (This is ironic since bereaved parents organizations are called ‘the group that no one wants to belong to.’
Back to my dad . . . when he received his terminal diagnosis a few weeks before passing on, we talked about the sadness that we both felt. I said ‘Dad, sadness is like diarrhea; don’t try to hold it in.’ Always a fan of a good joke, he laughed out loud. To learn more about and benefit from his end-of-this-life journey, see article
People grieve differently for a number of reasons . . .
a. Your level of consciousness: are you at a beginner, intermediate, or more advanced level now? These terms describe how evolved your awareness is, not the age of your soul. Don’t worry about what level you are at now because, as great religious and spiritual teachers across time have said, you can ‘see the Light’, realize your true nature, and live accordingly whenever you are ready. As the saying goes ‘When the student is ready, the teacher will appear.’
b. Your age: in general, elders have more experiences to draw from when things get tough. However, factor (a) – your level of consciousness – can trump this one. For example, an advanced soul manifesting in a young person’s body may process grief better than a beginner soul playing its role in an elderly earth-suit.
c. The number of changes: getting ‘double teamed’ by two or more big changes in a short period of time can make it more difficult to keep your balance. I recently worked with a woman whose mom passed on and her son’s body died in an accident within a year. Soon thereafter, her husband became blind and lost his job. That’s a lot of changes in a short period of time! With the information and resources shared in this program, she was able to remember ‘The Great News’, heal, and become a greater force for good in our world.
d. How close you are to the person who moved on: You may grieve more over one person or pet than others. I suspect this is a function of being primary or secondary soulmates, but other factors can be involved. For example, were they one of your last remaining dear family members or friends on earth? Did you share a special bond that makes their apparent absence more difficult?
e. The severity of changes: this factor can be relative, for example, consider the impact when teenagers transition by suicide versus octogenarians pass on while asleep.
f. The quality of your support team: dealing with big changes is easier when you have a large group of loving and supportive family members, friends, and pets.
g. Past teachings about life, death, and the afterlife: have you attended open-minded and open-hearted spiritual centers that did a good job of explaining who you are, why you’re here, and Who walks beside you always? Or have you been exposed to fear-based fundamentalist preaching that you are sinful, could fry in hell forever, and there’s only one way to salvation.
h. Did you have a chance to say ‘see you later’ and/or make peace with the dying person?
i. Were you present at the funeral / memorial service?
j. Did you actively grieve at the time of passing or not?
While compiling this list, I realized at a deeper level why grieving can be so difficult. It involves so many varying feelings and changes with family, friends, and furry ones. (I italicized ‘can be’ to remind you that, ultimately, you choose how you react. This program helps you make an informed choice and provides resources for taking higher energy paths.)
By the way, lower energy emotions and actions can indirectly create blessings. How? They can serve as a contrast and show you how you don’t want to be. After one day – or maybe one lifetime – of ‘negative’ thoughts, words, and actions, you can awaken and say ‘Hey! This isn’t working for me. I deserve to feel and be better. I think I’ll try a higher energy approach.’ This is a good example of how, from a greater reality perspective, it’s really true that: It’s all good, it’s all G.O.D. The more you primarily identify with your real self, the more this is obvious.
Suggested action steps . . .
- after deeply relaxation, prayer, and/or meditation, ponder what would help lighten and abbreviate your grief
- attend Greater Reality Healing meetings and consider forming your own group
- attend other grief recovery groups and, if you feel called to do so, share some of the evidence-based information and holistic resources from this program
Information, resources, and action steps in the following articles have helped many people grieve optimally in their own way:
#29 Optimally Handling Suffering
#51 Meditation, Yoga, and Relaxation
#74 Is Your Life Unfolding Perfectly?
#79 Changing Worlds in Eight Days
#88 Prayer
Key #4: Learn the Evidence That No One Really Dies
This is item #1 in ‘The Great News’ because it’s so vital to know that life after bodily death has been definitively proven. Scientific and clinical evidence – as well as many convincing firsthand experiences – can comfort, inspire, and empower you. That evidence is considerable so I won’t try to summarize it here; see articles 60, and 115 for a review of the scientific, clinical, and experiential evidence.
You can know, without a doubt, that you will see your loved ones again when you cross over. What’s more, you can enjoy a different, but very real and meaningful, relationship with them now.
The fear of death is so common and deep-seated that it impairs the earthly experience for many people. Combine that with ridiculous notions of a fiery eternal afterlife and a vengeful dictatorial God, and the stage is set for people to feel fear, guilt, and other lower energy emotions. Fortunately, all worries about dying are needless – especially in 2025 when scientific proof is announced and demonstrated. In addition, those depictions of ‘hell’ and God are not supported by the collective evidence about the nature of reality.
Educate yourself about this evidence so you know that bodily death is just a ‘see you later’, not a ‘good-bye’. Again, the belief that death is the end of life is based on archaic fear-based and uninformed teachings. It may seem that your loved ones left you, but that is an optical delusion; their essence and energy did not and cannot die. As discussed in the last key, the Greater Reality Healing Program can help you better perceive your postmaterial loved ones.
Discuss this evidence with close family, friends, co-workers, and kindred spirits to more deeply internalize it. Share it via social media, book clubs, and discussion groups so you and they can more fully internalize the magnificent news that no one really dies. Teaching this news is a powerful way to internalize it even more deeply.
While attending theology school in the 1970’s, I read several books by pioneers in the field of thanatology – the study of death. One author shared results of interviews with children who were asked about their conceptions of death. Many children thought that death was like taking a trip and you would return to earth. The author commented in a rather patronizing way that these young ones couldn’t comprehend that death was the end of life. It’s ironic that these children were spot on: death IS a lot like taking a trip and enjoying another never-ending but oft-changing adventure in eternity.
Two clinical categories of afterlife evidence that support this view are Death Bed Visions and Shared Death Experiences. Before passing on, people sometimes report seeing postmaterial visitors – people and pets – who, it is felt, are there to assist the dying person back Home. Most impressively from an evidential perspective, many doctors, nurses, and family members have also glimpsed these otherworldly visitors!
My 92-year-old mom Virginia had two death bed visions in 2023 several days before she left her body. Mom was largely comatose for over a week and only slightly awakened a few times a day while mumbling incoherent phrases. However, the following two events suggest that her closest postmaterial loved ones were indeed there to assist her into the next phase of life.
During the first one, mom energetically tried to get out of the hospital bed. When her caregiver asked what she needed, mom said ‘Bill and June are here. I’ve got to get ready to go with them!’ (Bill was / is her husband and June her beloved sister.) The second time, after another vigorous attempt to get out of bed, mom said ‘I’ve got to pack. I’m going on vacation.’ Our family was heartened by these signs that she was indeed aided by loved ones.
(The marked increase in movement, awareness, and verbalization during death-bed visions and terminal lucidity is considered by clinicians to be caused by the person’s consciousness coming to the fore. That is, it’s not that the body and brain temporarily but significantly recovered; rather, it’s the person’s spirit / life-force / energy starting to take over as the body dies. To emphasize life instead of death, I propose ‘Pre-Afterlife Visions’ to replace ‘Death-Bed Visions’ and ‘Pre-Afterlife Lucidity’ instead of ‘Terminal Lucidity’.)
Some people feel closer to pets and other animals than they do most people. This is especially common for more evolved, sensitive, and/or empathic persons who can feel the lower energies of imbalanced and hurtful people. Unless they have been severely mistreated, pets provide unconditional love and close companionship that some people haven’t found in human relationships. If you’re a big fan of ‘furry spirits’, you’ll be glad to know that solid clinical evidence indicates the life-force / consciousness of animals also continues after bodily death.
Many people have sensed their postmaterial pets firsthand. Here is one of the most powerful stories I’ve heard and I know of many. Heidi had a cat named Lucky that passed over at age twenty-one. As you will see, the afterlife contact with her prepared Heidi and her family for a very difficult time. She states:
“I wasn’t a religious person and never really believed in life after death, but the following experience in 1990 changed my beliefs. I had just laid down in bed for the night. I was still awake when I felt that someone was calling for me. I sat up and thought ‘I can’t go. If Bill (her husband) wakes up, he’ll wonder where I am.’ That didn’t seem to matter because before I knew it I was going down our hall. I didn’t make the conscious decision to go and I actually do not remember getting up and walking.
I noticed a very bright light coming from our son’s bedroom. I looked in and saw my cat Lucky who had passed on about four months earlier. She was rolling around on her back the way cats do when they feel good. She appeared young and didn’t have arthritis anymore. I was amazed at how bright it was in the room. I looked at the window and thought, “The sun isn’t out and the light in the room isn’t this bright.”
I knew that someone was behind me. It seemed like the person was dressed in a white robe and I felt it was Jesus. I remember thinking how warm and peaceful I felt . . . I had never felt anything like it. I looked down at my feet, but it was like they weren’t there. I reached for my cat with both hands to touch her but a man’s voice said, “No, don’t touch her.” I immediately pulled my hands back to my chest and realized, “That’s right, I don’t want to ruin it for her.” After a while, she started to fade away. I felt sad that she was going, and then it was over.
I didn’t tell anyone about this until my husband and I were watching a TV show about near death experiences a month later. I told Bill because my experience was so similar and he felt it was from God. I also eventually told my father. Dad asked me to tell him the story again four times during the week before he passed on even though he wasn’t ill and his death was totally unexpected.
Our son Mike was killed in a car accident on January 13, 2001. I cannot begin to put into words how difficult that was, but the experience I had with Lucky eleven years before helped us through that terrible time. We KNOW Mike is still with us because we have had several contacts from him. We miss his physical presence very much, but we have the peace of mind that he is alive and well in another place.
I received this story from Heidi over 20 years ago and have read it many times. Even so, I had tears in my eyes reading it again.
True scientific research on an afterlife for animals hasn’t, to my knowledge, been conducted yet. We look forward to doing that with SoulPhone technology in the future.
Suggested action steps . . .
- Read the articles and/or books listed above so you thoroughly know and understand the collective evidence that now definitively proves that life continues after bodily death
- Share this evidence with loved ones and, if you can, more widely via social media and groups.One of the best ways to learn is to teach so this will deepen your knowing about the evidence.
- Watch my videos and those by afterlife experts listed in this program.
To learn the collective evidence that life continues beyond bodily death, read . . .
The Afterlife Evidence book
Key #5: Benefit from Your Earthly AND Spiritual Support Teams
Remember: you don’t have to take this journey alone. Many people reach a point in this earthly experience where they need to lean on others. (You can consider how to do that while listening to the soulful song Lean on Me by Bill Withers.) Talk with close family members, friends, and pastoral and/or psychological counselors. Attend healing programs like this one and others. Many people have the training, experience, and desire to help so please don’t suffer in silence. After you’ve healed and transformed, you can help others.
Some family and friends will really be there for you; they will listen, not judge, and support you. Others, as you may have discovered, may not be comfortable being around you or talking about your changes. In my opinion, this is often because doing so would magnify their fears about death and other big changes. As you journey through grief, you’ll find new friends who are more on the same wavelength. See article to learn more about this process.
Meet kindred spirits at places you most love and enjoy. Your list will likely be different, but here’s where I’ve found evolved persons to congregate:
a. ‘Higher Thought’ spiritual centers such as Unity, Unitarian Universalist, Centers for Spiritual Living, United Church of Christ (UCC), Buddhist, Reform Judaism, Hindu, Sufism, Spiritualist, and indigenous spirituality groups
b. other denominations, churches, and spiritual centers with open-hearted and open-minded focuses that lovingly practice the Golden Rule
c. service organizations that can be found in any medium sized town
d. classes and retreats held at spiritual awareness and holistic health centers
e. meditation, yoga, drumming, kirtan, sound healing, and dance groups
Also be sure to enlist guidance and assistance from your angels, guides, master teachers, and Creator. (The term ‘master teachers’ refers to highly evolved beings whose life and teachings inspired the formation of religions.) Ask for their help in handling big changes with style. It’s been said that an atheist is a person with no invisible means of support. Some scientific and much clinical and experiential evidence indicates the reality of higher energy assistance. Depending on your religious or more secular orientation, you may consider this assistance as coming from very evolved beings or higher energies.
Data from the SoulPhone Project indicates the reality of angels, and further research is planned for the future. In several experiments, a participating research medium invited an angel to participate in experiments. State-of-the-art sensors measured electromagnetic energies emanating from an angel versus a postmaterial person (PMP). Spectral analysis images of the angel’s energies were markedly brighter than that of the PMP.
I’ve experienced what I considered to be interactions with angels and Jesus.
At age 19, I was driving to my grandma’s funeral an hour away. A severe winter storm had left the interstate highway covered with several inches of ice. She and I were very close and I was supposed to be a pallbearer so I proceeded. Cars were traveling at only 10 MPH instead of the usual 70. I knew I wouldn’t make it in time so I passed a semi-truck by speeding up to 20 MPH. The righthand lane was just a little better than the passing lane so I eased back over after far ahead of the truck.
My car started spinning in circles, just like a top. Each time it did, I could see the semi getting closer and closer. When I could see the driver’s contorted face as he tried to slow down without jackknifing, I thought ‘I’m going to die.’ Then I said aloud ‘Jesus, help me!’ Immediately, my car shot off the road and the semi went by. A mile marker sign kept my car from going into a ditch and turning over. (The next year in physics’ classes, I learned that an outside force is required to change the course of a repetitively moving object.)
At age forty, while working on my first book, I was looking for a Biblical quote and couldn’t find any Concordance references. I suddenly felt ecstatic for no apparent reason and heard a slight rustling. Through my peripheral vision, I saw a white gauzy form like the fine lace-work of a wedding dress. As I turned to see it more clearly, it was gone. I felt energized and interpreted that as a sign that my work was in flow with Divine will and my soul’s missions. I then opened the Bible to the exact page I needed and my eyes went directly to the verses I sought: Hebrews 2:6-7 “What is man, that thou art mindful of him?… Thou made him a little lower than the angels… ”
For those of you with no or different religious faiths, this program is not about any one religion. It’s about, as Aldous Huxley termed it, the perennial philosophy that has surfaced in diverse religions and spiritual wisdom sources over time. There is considerable overlap in these views. As one of my yoga teachers Swami Satchidananda said ‘Truth is one, paths are many.’
I am most knowledgeable about Christianity because of my Lutheran church upbringing and attending Methodist theological school. In addition, I have learned much from religions listed under (a). Native American spirituality teachers said that ancient peoples viewed every day as a walk in the woods with Great Spirit. This relationship was so strong that they had no words for the concept of fear. Recently, I spoke with a Navajo guide during a tour of Monument Valley and asked what their language reflected about fear. After thinking a bit, Cody said ‘a chance to get stronger’. Well put!
I believe that higher energies / beings – for example, Jesus in the Middle East 2000 years ago and Buddha in the East 2500 years ago – take on outward forms in different times and locales to reach all people. Put another way, The Light manifests in various guises to help those who are ready to understand and act upon their true nature.
I created the Ask Your Soul, Angels, and The Light audio program that uses deep relaxation and guided imagery to help quiet your brain so you can discern your and their wisdom.
Suggested action steps . . .
- List three people you can ask to help; you’ll be amazed at how honored they are to help.
- Use the Ask Your Soul, Angels, and The Light audio program to access guidance and assistance from your true self and spiritual support team.
- Visit one or more of the places listed above where more evolved souls / people congregate to expand your circle of kindred spirits
To learn more and enjoy clearer contact with your spiritual support team, see articles:
#66 Optimal Relationships for More Evolved People
#71 Ask Your Soul, Angels, and The Light
#73 Angels and Higher Energy Assistance
#76 My Experiences and Lessons
#91 Pause and Remember
#121 Soulmates
Key #6: Upgrade Your Understandings about The Source
If you are completely happy with your beliefs about G.O.D. / The Light, there’s no need to read this section. However, many people have found religious teachings about God and afterlife to be lacking when loved ones pass on. Well-meaning ministers may offer platitudes that people find useless or offensive. Examples include: ‘It’s God’s will. God works in mysterious ways. They are in a better place now. God wanted your loved one to be with Him.’
In their defense, they are usually doing the best they can given their limited training. In theology school, I was shocked to see how little pastoral counseling preparation was given. After announcements and demonstrations discussed in Key #15, we will invite religious leaders and clergy to upgrade their understandings based as current information
When a loved one passes on by suicide, religious support can be even less helpful or downright cruel. I’ve worked with family members who were told by fundamentalist preachers ‘Your child is in Hell forever because he committed the unforgiveable sin!’ This view is blasphemous to The Creator and Sustainer of All Life. Open-minded and loving humans can understand when someone just can’t handle being on earth anymore. Surely angels, guides, master teachers, and The Source of all love and peace understand as well.
Suicide is now the #2 cause of death for ages 15 – 35 so the root causes need to be addressed as fully and quickly as possible. As discussed in article these are clear to holistic health care providers. Unfortunately, the causes are not yet widely understood by most people or traditional medical providers.
Historically, answering questions about G.O.D. – the Guiding, Organizing, and Designing Presence and Power behind all life – was entrusted to religious institutions. There are 40,000 denominations in Christianity alone and over 10,000 religions in the world; as such, it’s impossible to accurately characterize their performance. In general, however, I give religion a grade of C for their teachings about The Source and the nature of reality. Teachings about this by mainstream denominations – the ‘silent majority’ – can be so vague as to be useless. Fundamentalist denominations – the vociferous minority – get a grade of F since they horribly scare, scar, and misinform so many people.
People who think for themselves and listen to their heart understandably reject bizarre fear-based messages. An elderly woman I interviewed described attending a church service as a child with her parents. The preacher talked long and loudly about a fiery eternal hell and the importance of avoiding it. Afterwards, the family stopped by the front door to greet the preacher. ‘How did you like the service, little girl?’ he asked. She answered ‘I didn’t like it. God wouldn’t put anyone in hell forever.’ The preacher replied ‘Well, maybe you shouldn’t come here anymore!’ The girl’s parents answered ‘Maybe we shouldn’t.’
Regarding teachings about the nature of creator and the afterlife, Max Muller – a 19th century pioneer of comparative religion – said ‘Nothing can be really true that offends the sensibilities of a child.’ I posted his quote above my desk during theology and clinical psychology training. It’s a great litmus test for discerning what is true and what is B.S.
Views from fundamentalist denominations are often still tied to Roman and Greek images from 300 BC or earlier: a huge white-bearded and long-haired white man who sits on a throne in the sky and arbitrarily decides who lives or dies when and how. That hopelessly archaic and inaccurate image keeps people from wanting a personal relationship with The Light. Joseph Campbell, professor of comparative religion and author of The Hero’s Journey, said the ‘God’ behind all creation in the cosmos differs greatly from local ‘provincial gods’ as viewed by warring tribes millennia ago.
In what other field do we rely on beliefs from thousands of years ago? Contemporary clinical evidence from near-death experiences and Life Between Lives data indicates that humans are NOT separate from Creator. As many people report after clinically dying and returning to earth: ‘We each are one with the One and part of Source Energy’. This insight changes everything for the better and helps you realize that, indeed, ‘It’s all good, it’s all God.’
Denominations from every religion teach our essential oneness with Creator . . .
- Sufism: “I looked into myself and saw that I am He.”
- Referring to The One, the Hindu Upanishads proclaim: “I am everywhere, shining forth from all beings.”
- Christianity: “The Father and I are One.”
- Islam: “All is Allah.”
- The sayings ‘Isness Is’, ‘God is One’, and ‘I Am That I Am’ all reflect that there is no actual separation or duality in life.
- As Joel Goldsmith wrote in The Infinite Way, “That which I am seeking, I am.”
Since the word ‘God’ automatically conjures up images of a big dictatorial guy in the sky, you may want to upgrade your terms for the Creator and Sustainer of All Life. I prefer The Light, All That Is, The One, Source Energy, Higher Power, The Divine, Creative Energy, and Cosmic Intelligence. I also love the Unity affirmation ‘There is only one Presence and one Power in the world, God the good omnipotent.’
During a ‘dark night of the soul’ phase in my youth, I sat in my car late one night and wondered why my life seemed to be falling apart. Not knowing what else to do, I prayed ‘Dear God, please help me to always know and do your will.’ Fifty years later, I would word it this way: ‘Dear Creator and Sustainer of all life, thank you for helping me to always know and fulfill my soul’s missions in alignment with yours.’
Looking back, that prayer seemed to be a turning point and I used it often. It marked a deeper personal spiritual relationship with The Source even though my religious beliefs had shifted radically. My prayers shifted from supplication (please God, help me) to gratitude (thank you for helping me).
Suggested action steps . . .
- Have a heart-to-heart talk with your Higher Power so you can more deeply know that since G.O.D. is with and within you, there is nothing and no one to fear.
- Attend services at churches and spiritual groups that share a more accurate image of a loving Creative Intelligence.
- Post quotes from above that resonate with you so you’ll see them often.
To learn more about this topic, see articles . . .
#4 When a Loved One Passes on by Suicide
#5 When You Are Considering Suicide
#13 What Is G.O.D. Like?
#36 Suicide: Core Causes and Holistic Solutions
#78 Why Did God Take My Loved One?
#100 Enlightenment
Key #7: Know Your True Nature AND Live Accordingly
‘Who am I?’ and ‘How can I best live while on earth?’ are two of the most important questions you can ask.
I’ll address the ‘Who am I?’ question first. From a scientific perspective, you are a timeless being of energy and consciousness who is, in part, manifesting as a human being. From a religious / spiritual view, you are a beloved child of The Divine now and always. Many people suffer needlessly because of the illusion that they can die and are separate from others and Creator. The more enlightened you become, the more you can know and show the light within that is your real self AND your loved ones who have changed worlds.
Jesus, who drew upon Jewish and other wisdom sources that contributed to the Christian perspective, allegedly spoke of being one with the Father. The Buddha purportedly said that we each are like drops of water in the oceanic Divine. Sufi wisdom reportedly said that G.O.D. is as near to you as your hands and feet. Hindu mystics supposedly stated that the individual soul is nothing else in essence but the universal soul.
(I say ‘allegedly, purportedly reportedly, and supposedly’ because there is no factual record of what was actually said thousands of years ago. The overall messages were shaped over time, but we can’t know what one individual said for sure. After 1 1/2 years of Biblical history courses in theology school, the head professor said ‘In conclusion, it’s clear there is very little – if any – factual evidence for details in the Bible. Ultimately, the Christian message must be taken on faith.’ When I heard that, I thought ‘I wish you would have told me this on the first day of classes. I could have saved a lot of tuition money!)
That’s why I encourage people to consider three sources of information before making conclusions about the nature of reality:
(1) indications from contemporary evidence
(2) religious / spiritual teachings that resonate with you
(3) your inner knowing while walking with your Higher Power
Prominent scientists provide instructive views about your true nature. Quantum physicist David Bohm PhD said humans are like ripples of excitation in an endless sea of energy. Depending on the observer’s perspective, sensory abilities, and level of consciousness, those ripples may appear as light, information, love, or a formed human.
Albert Einstein PhD, a contemporary of Dr. Bohm’s at Princeton University, stated “A human being is a part of the whole, called by us ‘Universe,’ a part limited in time and space. He experiences himself, his thoughts and feelings as something separate from the rest – a kind of optical delusion of his consciousness.”
I hope you take the time to learn and demonstrate who you really are. This is a huge key to handling life’s biggest changes with style and experiencing the greatest life you have envisioned. The following articles can help, but personally experiencing your true nature is much more impactful than words. Daily prayer, meditation, and centering practices – as described in articles #51, and #77 – expand your knowing about who you really are.
Now let’s consider the second part of the title for Key #7: Know Your True Nature AND Live Accordingly. Everyone is unique so what ‘living accordingly’ looks like will vary widely. To be clear . . . there is no set way for people to live after awakening to their real nature. In general, however, many people increasingly:
- seek evidence-based answers to life’s biggest questions
- question teachings by traditional churches about life, afterlife, and Creator
- try to identify and share their greatest gifts AKA their soul’s missions
- spend more time with beloved family, friends, and pets
- help others in ways they feel called
- take better care of their temple of the soul
- minimize exposure to negative news, mindless TV shows, and video games
- attend churches and spiritual groups that are more loving and open-minded
- use centering practices to discern their inner wisdom about how to best live
- develop a personal relationship with The Light and highly evolved beings who teach and demonstrate more enlightened views
You get the idea. People realize that, even though their essence is immortal, this earthly experience is a brief and sacred opportunity. As such, they make wiser choices about how to spend their time. That’s what ‘living accordingly’ means.
Suggested action steps . . .
- Regularly use ‘the big three’ listed above – prayer, meditation, and centering practices – to more deeply remember your true nature
- Use conscious language that reinforces the fact that YOU are much more than your earthly form. For example, say ‘this body is ___ years old’ versus ‘I am. . . ‘
- Use the ‘three sources of information’ approach above to better discern what you think is really real.
To learn more about your true nature, read articles:
#15 The Nature of Humans
#23 Are You More Evolved and Sensitive?
#118 Who and What Are You Really?
Key #8: Learn About ‘The Afterlife’
Understanding more about what happens after bodily death can lighten and abbreviate your grieving. Many people in Western cultures have one of two views about it:
- that’s it: end of story, nothingness, complete cessation of consciousness and life
- your soul – sooner or later – ends up in either heaven or hell forever
The collective afterlife evidence proves that (a) is false. View (b) is what many people believed in the Middle Ages, also known as The Dark Ages, or earlier. As such, needless fears and misinformation that complicate the grief process have persisted.
While writing my book Soul Proof, I called ministers of different mainstream Protestant denominations to learn their current views about heaven and hell. One minister described hell – as portrayed in that church’s 15th century doctrines – as a place of endless torment for the wicked and unrepentant. I said ‘OK, that’s what your denomination believed in the 15th century. But what does it believe now?’ There was a pause before he replied, ‘We still adhere to statements in those doctrines.’
Really?!
People often ask me ‘What is the afterlife like?’ My views are based on clinical data from near-death experiences, shared death experiences, Life Between Lives sessions, highly evidential mediums, and my inner knowing and feelings.
Before answering this important question, it’s vital to remember that only part of the totality of your energy / consciousness is needed for this earthly experience. As such, part of your real self – and that of all people – is quite likely enjoying life at Home / Heaven / the Really Real Place now. Put another way, you and they are in eternity right now. Forever doesn’t start after your earthly body dies . . . you are already in it. See article about multilocation / simultaneous realities and #15 about the nature of humans to understand this better.
The next point to understand about ‘the afterlife’ is that the quality of the next phase of life varies greatly for different people. Your level of consciousness at the time of transitioning from earth determines the quality of your initial afterlife experience. How evolved and aware are you while passing on? Have you loved, accepted, and forgiven yourself and others? How close are you to Source Energy and highly evolved assistants / assistance? What are your goals for the next phase of eternity? What lessons do you need to learn better?
The answers to those and other questions shape how your next stage of life will be.
Here’s an example of two very different people and their possible afterlife experiences. Mother Theresa spent her life caring for suffering people and encouraging others to do the same. When her real self / soul was ready to graduate from earth-school, it probably was merely like walking from one room to another. She lived such a loving and highly spiritual life that her consciousness while on earth was very much aligned with the energy of higher realms in the next phase. Mother Theresa may have been greeted by soulmates, angels, and others who exclaimed ‘Theresa is back! Kudos for embodying the words of Jesus and other great spiritual teachers / Illumined Ones while you were on earth!’ And she likely said ‘It’s great to be back. How can I help here?’
At the other end of the spectrum, consider someone like Hitler whose actions led to the death and suffering of so many people. The time before his bodily death was likely filled with fear, frustration, anger, and other lower energy emotions. As such, he may have experienced a hellish afterlife experience. The degree of suffering he caused may have delayed his life review because it would have been intolerable. Hitler is one who probably needed a long period of rest, rehabilitation, and counseling before he could even begin to review what went wrong. His lower energy aspects would be destroyed, but his life-force is indestructible. That essence, the drop of God within, can learn to do better and be an equally significant force for good.
To be clear, his hellish feelings and life review experience were NOT punitive. To be clear, his hellish feelings and life review experience were NOT punitive. His temporary and self-imposed ‘hell’ might have lasted millennia in earth-time but it’s not eternal. His hellish time was NOT put upon him by a vengeful ‘god’ who demanded justice; it was the predictable result of his predominant thoughts, words, and deeds.
(By the way, I use modifiers about the quality of Hitler’s afterlife experience – such as ‘may have, likely, probably’ – because humans can’t see the cosmic picture. He was abused as a child and was likely very mentally imbalanced. As such, his brain-based consciousness was clearly not a good match for his transcendent source of consciousness. He may have been affected by ‘malicious spirits’ who took advantage of his mental state. Hitler also tapped into a huge collective anger and desire for revenge held by the German people after World War I. These understandings don’t in any way condone his inhumane actions. But they do reflect how highly evolved beings look at the big picture and understand how things could go so very wrong.)
I mention all this in detail because so many people fear – consciously or unconsciously – roasting in hell forever for little infractions that all people commit. One of my greatest teachers about this was a patient named June, a ninety-year old who I helped at my clinic for 15 years. June was widely considered a saint in our town; she regularly attended church and was involved in many community projects for those in need. She was always loving, positive, and focused on how she could serve.
After working with her for many years, I could see that her body was deteriorating and death was ‘around the corner’. I felt called to say to her ‘June, I don’t know if I’ll see you on earth again, but it’s been an honor to know you and witness your care to others. I look forward to seeing you in heaven someday.’
When I said that, she got a very concerned look on her face and said ‘I sure hope I go to heaven (while looking up) and not the other place (while looking down). At that moment, I thought ‘Oh my God! If someone like June fears a fiery retribution, what is it like for many people?’ I consider this to be a major failure by religious institutions that such a saintly person would even think of being punished in the next phase of life. To better understand the depth of love and understanding in the cosmos for everyone, read ‘My Descent Into Death’ by Rev. Howard Storm and watch his YouTube videos. I heard him speak twice about his near-death experience and the never-ending opportunity to accept The Light that is within and all around.
In addition, what you experience after your body dies can change over time. That is, ‘the afterlife’ isn’t the same for all eternity. You can improve your earthly experience via higher energy thoughts, words, and actions. Similarly, your afterlife experience can become more heavenly as you learn, upgrade your energy, and walk hand-in-hand with The Divine. The next phase of life, it turns out, has much in common with this one.
I talked openly about all this with my mom and dad before they passed on 16 years apart to the day! When I asked dad what he wanted to experience in the afterlife, he replied ‘I want to be with my loved ones, spend time in nature, and help other people and animals.’ I said ‘Dad, that’s how your life is now.’ (That’s a clue to checking to see if you’re living on purpose.)
My mom wanted to, at least initially, relive when she was a young housewife and her three children were little and needed her. She also wanted to live in our family house where everyone grew up. ‘Except I want the dining and TV rooms to be larger and have more windows.’ After reliving that time in her life, she wanted to help people in different ways starting with working in a library. The movie ‘What Dreams May Come’ with Robin Williams did a great job of portraying how our thoughts and intentions shape our reality while on earth and beyond.
Grieving people sometimes worry about their loved ones who have passed on. The most common concerns are about those who:
a. transitioned by suicide: angels, other highly evolved assistants / energies, and The Light are more loving and understanding than you can fathom. Your loved ones who couldn’t handle being on earth any longer are lovingly tended to as they rest, heal, and receive counseling.
b. led a criminal or troubled earthly life: do good parents punish babies who have trouble walking? Of course not; they lovingly and patiently help and never give up on them. Mother / Father God surely does much better than that.
c. weren’t ‘saved’ so will suffer in ‘hell’ forever: this concern is totally unnecessary since there is no fiery eternal hell. Further, everyone is inherently saved by their true nature as children of The Most High. Awakening to ‘The Great News’ saves you from spiritual ignorance and the suffering therein. Humans might think that some people are irreparably sinful or evil, but The Light distinguish between the doer and the deed.
Suggested action steps . . .
- Read the articles and books listed in this key to learn more about contemporary understandings about the next phase of life.
- Discuss this topic with others with open-minds and hearts
- Since you create the quality of your afterlife experience AND it can improve as your consciousness does, consider how you want yours to be at least initially.
This is a very deep subject that I can’t address fully in this article. To learn more, see articles:
#14 Heaven and Hell: What Are They Really?
#16 Evidence-Based Teachings About the Nature of Reality
#42 What Is ‘the Afterlife’ Like for Evil Doers?
#47 ‘evil spirits’ and ‘the devil’
#107 What Is ‘the Afterlife’ Like?
Key #9: Optimally Care for Yourself
Anxiety, depression, insomnia and other symptoms are common after big changes. The underlying imbalances that cause these symptoms can negatively impact you physically, emotionally, mentally, and spiritually. Deep grief can stress your nervous, immune, GI, muscular, and hormonal systems. Interactions between these bodily systems can cause a variety of symptoms. For example, the GI system produces nearly as many neuropeptides – chemical messengers that allow the body to communicate within itself – as the brain. That’s one reason why distress of your gastrointestinal system can cause brain fog, depression, fatigue, and other ‘mental’ ailments.
Natural health care providers understand the importance of working with the body instead of treating it like it’s weak and ignorant. Traditional medical treatment – with protocols driven by the disease-care industry – usually prescribe potentially harmful prescription drugs instead of addressing the underlying causes with Safe, Affordable, Natural, and Efficient (SANE) care. That’s why it’s so important to use optimal self-care and natural treatments first whenever possible.
Medical treatment with drugs and surgery may be necessary for crises, but there are potential risks. For example, drug side-effects may be worth it when people are very suicidal. (Natural healing methods don’t work overnight since they assist the body’s restorative mechanisms).
Similarly, drugs might be needed for people who are not good candidates for natural health care approaches. Medications to assist rest, decrease anxiety, and lessen depression may be needed for a while. After the person’s condition has stabilized, they may be good candidates for proceeding with self-care and natural treatments.
When you are grieving, it can be difficult to motivate yourself to take those first few steps toward recovery. You may not feel like getting out of bed but, if you can push yourself just a bit, making small changes can yield big results. Family members and friends can help so please listen to their advice when you’re not thinking clearly.
My book Radiant Wellness discusses seven natural keys to becoming more happy, healthy, and aware. Optimal health care, which is doubly important when you are off balance from grief and/or other big changes, falls into three categories:
a. Self-care: Proper rest, exercise, whole foods and supplements, inner cleansing practices, maintaining awareness, and remembering your transcendent nature.
b. Holistic health care: Acupuncture, chiropractic adjustments, nutritional healing, psychological and/or pastoral counseling, deep tissue massage, and integrative medicine.
c. Drugs and surgery: Usually best for emergencies because of the significant risks, drugs and surgery may relieve symptoms but often don’t address core causes of underlying imbalances. My holistic health care centers taught about (a) and provided most of the treatments listed under (b). Even so, we sometimes recommended traditional medical care for patients who needed it temporarily. That was also necessary for those who were too ill – often after lots of prescription drugs, surgeries, and self-abuse – to respond well to natural methods.
‘Recreational’ drug use – marijuana and alcohol, for example – can numb you out but block optimal grieving. Some people have benefited from various ‘mind-expanding’ drugs – LSD, ayahuasca, and ketamine therapy, for example – but those may have negative side-effects. After trying different chemical approaches to ‘getting high’ in the 1970’s, I strongly encourage natural approaches to feel and be outstanding.
If you are suffering with one or more ailments, know that your body is amazingly resilient when it has what is needed to heal itself. Named diseases or syndromes that improved significantly or totally at my holistic health care offices included: multiple sclerosis, Crohn’s disease, Lyme’s disease, irritable bowel syndrome, cardiomyopathy, diabetes, neuropathy, lupus and other autoimmune disorders, ADD / ADHD, autism, asthma, Raynaud’s disease, GERD, chronic fatigue syndrome, ulcer, gall bladder disease, colitis, erectile dysfunction, benign prostatic hypertrophy (BPH), PTSD, memory loss, heart arrhythmia, psoriasis, and eczema.
Many natural health care practitioners get similar results with patients who use natural healing methods over time. Nutrition-based healing is very helpful for grieving persons, especially women who lack key nutrients after pregnancies. Depression, anxiety, panic attacks, insomnia, OCD symptoms, suicidal thoughts, and many other symptoms can be caused by:
* deficiencies of key nutrients due to poor diet and fake supplements, and
* excess chemicals, heavy metals, microorganisms, and electromagnetic radiation
Too little of ‘the good things’ and too much of ‘the bad things’ can cause many more symptoms that most people realize. This often occurs around age 40 when the body runs out of key building blocks needed for optimal wellness. Grief just adds to that dilemma.
The good news is that the body usually responds very well to a regimen of self-care and natural healing methods. I highly recommend that you find a Nutrition Response Testing or Applied Kinesiology practitioner to design and oversee a personalized healing program for you. Natural health care approaches, as described in the articles below, can often literally work wonders. I hope you love yourself enough to spend some time, energy, and money for fine-tuning your body and brain.
Suggested action steps . . .
- Inventory your wellbeing and prioritize improving yourself in three ways.After those have been addressed, select three more and continue as you fine-tune yourself.
- Develop a natural health care team, especially if you are actively grieving now.
- Do yourself a HUGE favor and get a nutrition-based evaluation.You will be amazed at how much more energetic, strong, and happy you feel after just a few months.
#12 Optimal Self Care
#32 Nutrition-Based Healing
#33 Six Stressors
#37 Detoxing Chemicals and Heavy Metals
#64 Drugs, Alcohol, and Greater Reality Living
#87 Natural Health Care
#88 Whole Food Way of Eating and Supplements
Key #10: Use Centering Practices
Remember . . . your brain thinks it knows everything, but actually perceives much less than 1% of reality. It’s important to regularly quiet your brain’s constant but limited analysis so you can better recall the big picture of life. You can do this via prayer, meditation, time in nature, exercise, music, playing with pets and children, sewing, gardening, breathwork, drumming, serving others, yoga, and spiritual fellowship. Spend a little time most days to do what helps:
- keep you in the now moment
- you feel the peace that passes all understanding
- you to be still and know you are part of G.O.D.
Centering practices can help you realize that change is unavoidable but suffering is optional. When you know that life and love are forever, it’s easier to accept that bodily death and other changes while on earth are natural parts of life. Death is just a comma, not a period, in life’s never ending saga.
One way to calm your brain is to minimize exposure to negative, superficial, and sensationalistic news – especially just before going to sleep. Unless there’s an ongoing emergency, you don’t need to check your phone calls, texts, and emails so often. And do you really need to stay updated about the latest Hollywood divorces, political bickering, or salaries of sports superstars? It’s OK to keep generally informed about what’s going on in the world, but don’t let yourself get hooked on too much news that can stress your body and brain.
Similarly, excess computer games, videos, and TV viewing can become an addiction. People are mentally stimulated by these in much the same way that sugar, white flour, and chemical additives over-excite the brain. As with addictive drugs, a tolerance develops and people need more and more stimulation to ‘get their fix’. Healthy grieving is delayed when you stay in denial and don’t work on yourself.
Minimizing the lists above will give you extra time and clarity for optimal grieving. As the saying goes: ‘You can’t stop birds of suffering from flying over your head, but you can prevent them from making a nest in your hair.’ (If you’ve seen my photo, you know this is an easy one for me.)
In Helping Parents Heal, we say ‘The bodily death of your child can make you better or bitter.’ Ultimately, it’s a moment to moment choice as to which path you choose. Change is inevitable but you can choose how you respond. Suffering is certain if you want everything to stay the same. Shifting from ‘I must have this’ to ‘I prefer this’ helps a lot. Regularly quieting your brain gives your wise consciousness a chance to speak up and realize all this.
Suggested action steps . . .
- Choose two or more practices that seem best for you
- Make time nearly every day to quiet your brain so you can hear your inner wisdom better
- Minimize exposure to excess stimulation
To learn more about centering practices, see articles:
#68 The Big Picture of Life
#77 Centering Practices
#86 Breathing Techniques
Key #11: Realize How Magnificent Life Is
One way to journey FROM deeply grieving TO brightly shining is to realize how wonderfully life is set up. This perspective helps you feel more grateful for being an important part in the grand scheme of things. To help you remember this, watch the movie ‘Joe Versus the Volcano’ with Tom Hanks and Meg Ryan. Nearly dead on a life raft at sea, Joe sees a huge moon rising and raises his arms to it as though in praise and surrender. Just before passing out, he says: ‘Dear God, thank you for my life. I forgot how big . . .’
One way to expand your awareness about how magnificently life is set up is to use advanced audio technology with binaural beats to promote brainwave entrainment and neuroplasticity. I’ve benefited from the following ‘hemi-sync’ products: (a) SacredAcoustics.com with Karen Newell and Eben Alexander MD, (b) The Shaman’s Heart from ByronMetcalfe.com, and (c) specific audios from MonroeInstitute.org.
Regular use of my audio programs help you remember that life is vast, eternal, and amazing. The Holistic Breathing Technique does that via deep, noisy, and prolonged diaphragmatic breathing with music and coaching in the background. I mention this technique again because it is so very powerful and transformative. I’ve personally used it hundreds of times over the last 27 years.
My other audio programs use deep relaxation and guided imagery to provide different benefits including recall of how magnificently life is set up. Three of those include:
a. The Life Review is a powerful way to remember what typically occurs after bodily death. Considered one of the most transformative aspects of near-death experiences, the life review reveals times when you did well and those when you didn’t. After each session, you can consider how to apologize, make amends, and do better the next time. Using this approach now can make your actual life review be a work of art after your body dies.
b. Past Life Regression expands your understanding of who you are and where you’ve been. It loosens primarily identifying with your earthly body and helps you relax into an eternity of fascinating and totally safe changes. This technique helps you explore the possibility that your real self / consciousness has visited other space-times that seem just as real as this one.
c. Pre-Birth Planning helps remember that you, ideally in conjunction with The Light and your spiritual support team, designed the possibility of key events in your life. Insights into what was chosen, and why, can help you improve your life now and assist the grief process. Clinical evidence from near-death experiences and Life Between Lives data indicates that pre-birth planning is a common part of pre-earth preparation.
People who periodically use these techniques report a heightened identification with their eternal essence and less with their temporary human body. They describe feeling more free and peaceful after remembering their infinite self and its role in the cosmos.
Suggested action steps . . .
- Use the Holistic Breathing technique to clear out old wounds and fears that can block benefits from the other audios
- Start with the audio(s) that you feel called to use
- Watch the movie cited or others, including natural documentaries, that remind you how vast and magnificent life really is
To learn more about expanding your awareness, see articles:
#25 Pre-Birth Planning: Did My Soul REALLY Choose All This?
#45 The Life Review: How Would Yours Feel Today?
#70 Holistic Breathing Technique
#74 Is Your Life Unfolding Perfectly?
#102 Past Life Regression
Key #12: Share Your Greatest Gifts
Serving others helps you as well as them. One key to moving through deep grief is to look around and observe ‘How can I help?’ Doing this in your loved one’s name honors them and creates more meaning to their passing. This sacred process of alchemy – like creating gold from straw – is a joy to behold. While working with Helping Parents Heal since 2014, I’ve seen many parents turn the corner after serving others in small or large ways. Some start foundations while others volunteer at church or school fundraisers. Below is one of the most powerful examples I’ve know of. Several years ago, I received an email from an older woman who wrote:
‘My husband, son, and family dog all passed on in the last year. They were all I had and I just can’t take the pain and loneliness. I’ve decided to move on by suicide and just wanted to tell someone good-bye before I did. I’ve followed your work for years and know you will understand.’
I replied, ‘I am sorry for all the understandable pain after three deaths in a short period of time. No one could or should judge you for deciding that you’ve had enough. Your spiritual support team and The Light will not judge, shame, or punish you. Quite likely, your loved ones will welcome you when you pass over.’
I continued ‘However, some evidence indicates that you / your soul may need to rest and recharge for a while before re-entering the flow of life and being with them on a regular basis. This isn’t punishment from an angry God but, rather, necessary rehab after energy-draining emotions – sadness, despair, guilt, fear, etc. – before, during, and after suicide. As such, you actually might be around your loved ones sooner and more fully if you can find a way to complete your earthly curriculum. Many deeply grieving people have found that serving others in need helped them have a breakthrough instead of a breakdown.’
I get emails like this fairly often and sometimes never learn what actions they choose. I pray for them, but don’t hold myself responsible about the outcome. A few months later, I received this message from her:
‘I wanted to let you know that I took your advice and it worked! Three times a week, I work at our local soup kitchen. I think of my loved ones and silently say their names with every plate of food I hand out. I’m going to make them proud of me and stay on earth until my work here is done. Sometimes, I think I can feel them smiling down on me and cheering me on. Thank you for showing me another way and helping me know I will see them again in a blink of an eye.’
This woman had three dear ones change worlds in a short period of time and, understandably, felt like she couldn’t go on. However, serving others helped her take one day at a time and honor the natural rhythms of earthly birth and death. Choosing a higher energy path through loving service also helped her feel her dear ones more keenly.
Helping others is also an excellent way to share your greatest gifts, that is, your soul’s missions. Good evidence from multiple sources indicates that we each come to earth with special talents and reasons for being here at this time. When we fulfill those purposes, we are more in alignment with our real selves, spiritual support team, and The Light. People who aren’t following their missions often feel what they variously describe as existential malaise, boredom, and creative discontent.
That’s understandable since they aren’t fulfilling their soul’s plan. Joseph Campbell put it this way: ‘If you follow your bliss, you put yourself on a kind of track that has been there all the while waiting for you. Then the life that you ought to be living is the one you are living.’ That’s another saying I had posted on my wall many years.
One of the most common questions I receive from people around the world is ‘How can I know what my soul’s missions are and fulfill them?’ You might not be surprised to learn that I’ve created an audio program Identify and Fulfill Your Purposes AND Create Your Greatest Life for this purpose.
Suggested action steps include:
- Consider how you can share your greatest gifts after prayer, meditation, or other way to access your inner wisdom.
- If necessary, use the audio program that helps you do that.
- Counseling, whether clinical or spiritual, can also help you discern how you can share your highest talents
To learn more about finding and sharing your special talents, see articles . . .
#21 Identify and Fulfill Your Highest Purposes
#80 Why Are You on Earth Now? S.A.G.E. Training
#117 You Might Be More Evolved If . . .
Key #13: Use the A.R.T. Technique
Your lower energy emotions (sadness, guilt, anger, etc.) will lessen as you regularly focus on higher ones (peace, joy, love, gratitude, enthusiasm) AND take higher energy actions. My A.R.T. Technique quiets your brain’s limiting analysis and helps you to do the following. (I’ll use the bodily death of a loved one since that’s such a common source of grieving. However, the A.R.T. principles can be applied to any sort of change / shift in your life.)
Appreciate all the blessings and lessons that came from being with your loved ones before they passed on.
Realize that you will see them again when you pass on, and that your relationship can continue now in a different way. Also realize that your loved ones are now enjoying realms characterized by more peace, joy, gratitude, and enthusiasm.
Transform every aspect of your life for the better as a result of having known beloved people and pets. You can have spiritually transformative experiences and know more deeply that life and love are forever. Further, you can honor their lives by shining more brightly and serving others.
These three steps naturally increase your clarity and power to sense more of life than ever before. As Antoine de Saint-Exupéry stated: “It is only with the heart that one can see rightly; what is essential is invisible to the eye.” Stay alert for signs and visits after upgrading what you focus on via the A.R.T. technique.
At age 71, I’ve encountered a number of big changes that initially felt like losses but turned out to be blessings. Here are three examples that the A.R.T. technique helped with . . .
1. At age 21, my first love girlfriend of four years broke up with me. At the time, I didn’t think I could go on living and grieved deeply. We were pre-engaged and had picked out names for our children. She was my best friend and the light of my life. We were also very young. After she broke up was the only time in my life when I briefly thought about suicide to ease the pain. It also was the only time I’ve awakened to my pillow being wet from crying in my sleep.
That is deep pain and sadness. Many years later, I still grieved ‘losing’ her. I dreamt about her and wondered how our life would be together. I hadn’t totally worked through all that, in part, because I starting smoking pot to escape the pain and numb out. Using the A.R.T. Technique, I was able to upgrade all this to:
Appreciate: She was a wonderful partner for four key years in my life. Our relationship was very positive and helped me in many ways. She was a shining light in my life when my mom’s depression created so much darkness.
Realize: If it is to be, I can see her again someday in the next phase of life. That one thought was instrumental in surviving those initial months after the break-up. If we are soulmates, I can better understand what that was about and why it impacted me so severely.
Transcendence: Part of what I do now is directly due to that event. ‘Loss’ is relative and, for me, that was huge. I resolved to convert all my lower energy emotions into positive ones that have helped many people immensely.
Many years later, that ‘loss’ – really a blessing in disguise – led to meeting the woman of my dreams. The current relationship of my dreams wouldn’t have happened if my high school sweetheart and I had stayed together. I can now clearly see that things wouldn’t have worked out with her and/or I wouldn’t have been able to follow my highest path.
2. I have profound hearing loss due to childhood viral infections. It definitely makes things more difficult but, as you now know, there are always silver linings. I sit up front so I can lip read which helps me really focus in and learn. I can turn off my hearing aids when it’s too noisy around me. And my deafness helped Chrisie hear.
Chrisie is an enthusiastic young lady who came to me for a nutrition-based healing evaluation. On her first visit, she said, ‘Please speak loudly and slowly right in front of me. I forgot my hearing aids and have to lip read.” I told Andy, an RN and acupuncturist at our office who had treated her before, about this. Andy said: ‘Chrisie always tells me that. I don’t think she can afford them.’ In that moment, I thought ‘Oh hell no! Not on my watch! I will help this young lady hear again.’ I called my wonderful audiologist Julie and asked if she would test Chrisie at a reduced fee using my back-up hearing aids that I donated.
Chrisie called me after her appointment; she and her mom had been sitting in their car crying with joy for 45 minutes. She described how wonderful it was to hear much better. Then it was my turn to have tears. In that moment, I felt what could best be described as ‘pure joy’. If I had normal hearing, I wouldn’t have been as aware of her needs and intervened.
Appreciate: I’m grateful for the silence when I want it, the miracle of hearing aids, having to focus more, and helping Chrisie.
Realize: With hearing aids, I can still hear fairly well. Most of all, my hearing loss is eminently worthwhile to help one other person hear better.
Transcendence: My impaired hearing is only for a blink of an eye in the span of eternity. My higher self may have volunteered to experience deafness for good reasons since more evolved souls often prefer quiet space versus noisy crowds.
3. In early 2000, half of my life savings were erased by the tech crash. On the evening before the bubble burst, my inner wisdom told me to get out of those investments. I actually felt a twisting and uncomfortable sensation over my solar plexus that screamed to sell off. But I listened to ‘the experts’ who said there would only be a brief correction followed by more great returns. This experience yielded two very important teachings . . .
- Pay attention to my inner wisdom, in this case, literally listening to my gut.This has been one of my most important lessons during this earthly experience.
- Be careful about listening to ‘the experts’ in any area.There are lots of them out there who are quite skilled at performing a ‘wallet-ectomy’ on you so beware.
I had planned to retire from private practice in 2000 so I could teach about spiritual awareness, holistic health, and optimal living full time. That, and two other huge financial changes in 2008 and after my marriage dissolved, necessitated continuing to see patients.
That summer, five-year old Hayley was brought to my office by her parents. She was born with a severe birth anomaly with her heart and large blood vessels on the right side of her body
Despite three surgeries by pediatric cardiac specialists, Hayley had very little energy and her skin color was grayish blue. She could only get out of bed one hour a day and wouldn’t be able to attend kindergarten in the autumn. Hayley tried to smile bravely, but it was clear she was struggling. After her exam, she gave me a weak hug.
I recommended a regimen of whole foods and nutritional supplements to provide her heart with essential building blocks to heal and regain better function. Within a few months, her skin was a rosy pink and her energy skyrocketed. She was able to attend school and enjoyed running around the playground with other children during recess. Her cardiologists, who didn’t know about natural health care, couldn’t understand how she recovered so quickly and thoroughly.
Her big hugs and smiles were sufficient payment.
Hayley continued to do well in every way. After the first year, I checked her twice a year for wellness visits. At age 20, she was a beautiful young lady who worked full time and continued to give me big hugs. If not for the tech crash and financial reasons to stay in practice, I wouldn’t have helped her and many other patients. And, over time, earnings from practicing and better investments more than made up for the financial losses.
Appreciate: I am very grateful for helping her and many other patients during the additional 20 years of seeing patients. I appreciate the abundance I had even after the crash and how my financial worth bounced back.
Realize: This test of spirit increased my compassion for others with different types of challenges. The benefits for me and many others were well worth the financial losses.
Transcendence: I believe that the multiple financial reversals – despite working very long and hard for decades and having a great investment team – were ‘a spiritual set-up’. It was very difficult and discouraging at times but resulted in great growth and service.
The A.R.T. technique helped me appreciate the past, realize there are greater blessings available IF I look for them, and transform for the better. All the information and resources I’m sharing have helped me create the greatest life of my dreams. They can do the same for you.
Suggested action steps include . . .
- Use the A.R.T. Technique to quiet your brain and discern better
- Identify three areas in your past that you think and/or dream about; those are clues as to which ones have stuck energy and need to be addressed
- Use this technique with a small group of kindred spirits; afterwards, share what you discovered and how you can heal and transform
For more information about these topics, see articles:
#17 Spiritually Transformative Experiences
#20 Discerning Your Inner Wisdom
#41 The A.R.T. Technique.
Key #14: Find, Benefit From, and Share the Silver Linings
Many years ago, I read a profound statement by the motivational author and speaker W. Clement Stone: “Every adversity has the seed for an equivalent or greater benefit.” I’ve personally found that to be true. In addition, I know many people who have demonstrated the wisdom of this statement. Other sayings that capture this perspective are:
a. Every cloud has a silver lining.
b. When one door closes, another opens . . . but it can seem like hell in the hallway for a while.
c. Two men looked through prison bars: one saw mud, the other stars.
I’ve found this process to be most powerful when I look for silver linings, give thanks when I find them, and use them to help myself and others.
Big changes in life can shake and wake you up from spiritual amnesia. It’s easy to get side-tracked from your reasons for being on earth by all the enticements out there. Throw in a large portion of fear, misinformation, and attempts to control you. It’s easy to understand why people forget who they are and why they are here. Dr. Newton’s research showed that souls sometimes repeatedly slumber through earthly incarnations instead of remembering and fulfilling their purposes.
Because of this, PMPs may design wake-up calls that motivate them to ask life’s most important questions, find meaningful answers, and take focused action steps. As such, what seems ‘bad’ can actually be ‘good’ if it helps you remember who you are, why you’re here, and Who walks beside you always. Thus the wisdom of the sayings ‘suffering is grace’ and ‘suffering is a blessing’ that might initially sound bizarre to you.
Different cultures believe that loved ones who pass into the next phase of life can convey special gifts. The documentary ‘Music by John Williams’ featured the life of the legendary pianist, composer, and conductor of Fiddler on the Roof, Jaws, Star Wars, ET, Indiana Jones, and many other classic movies. John perceived a spiritual gift after his dear wife Ruick passed on suddenly at age 44: ‘I felt she was helping me. I think that I grew up artistically or gained some kind of energy . . . The busiest and most successful period in my life in film started immediately thereafter.”
The biggest changes – that certainly can seem like tragedies – have huge potential benefits. Just imagine the transformative power generated when many grieving people focus on a common goal. The series of events described in article Greater Reality Helping Others and Our World gives me much hope for positive personal and planetary change. I hope it does the same for you.
While learning about this historic opportunity and how you can help, please remember that very difficult changes led you to this moment. They motivated you to search for meaning, heal, and find and share the blessings with others. Your involvement can help humanity reach a tipping point toward peace and wellness for all people and our planet. How’s that for finding and sharing silver linings?!
You’ve probably heard the saying ‘Where there’s a will, there’s a way’. Having a renewed purpose and joining in with grand adventures give you reason to positively transform.
Suggested action steps . . .
- From a more aware state of consciousness, think of your biggest apparent losses and what the silver linings are or could be
- Discuss this topic with your ‘master mind group’; talk about your silver linings and how you will share them with others
- Read article and consider how you can help yourself, others, and our world
To learn more, see articles . . .
#50 Choosing Action Over Discouragement
#68 The Big Picture of Life
#119 Eleven Keys to Helping Yourself, Others, and Our World
Key #15: Learn about the SoulPhone Project
As mentioned in the Introduction, Dr. Schwartz is a former Harvard and Yale professor who recently retired from the University of Arizona. A pioneer in the fields of behavioral medicine, energy healing, and survival of consciousness, Dr. Schwartz now directs the SoulPhone Project at the Laboratory for Advances in Consciousness and Health.
For over 25 years, he has researched the question ‘Does life continue after bodily death?’ Schwartz and his team of electrical engineers, software developers, evidential mediums, and postmaterial (so-called ‘departed’) luminaries have now scientifically and definitively proven that bodily death is NOT the end of life. Since 2016, I’ve been the spokesperson for this project, and assisted in the research and strategic planning. Two paradigm-shifting events are planned for 2026:
* Official announcements of scientific proof that life continues after bodily death.
* Demonstrated communication with PMP luminaries who want to help us.
Dr. Schwartz’s accumulated scientific data since 1999, and especially the last several years, allow me to responsibly make these admittedly big claims. One of his books, with a title based on a quote by Carl Sagan PhD, is ‘Extraordinary Claims Require Extraordinary Evidence’. We will have all the evidence in place before announcing and demonstrating this extraordinarily wonderful news.
These two events can be like the ‘penny floating in the air’ moment for Demi Moore’s character in the movie Ghost. (Be sure to watch this great movie if you haven’t or it’s been a while.) Widespread awareness of (a) and (b) above, in conjunction with the Greater Reality Healing Program, can sufficiently dissolve fear and engender hope to improve your life and our world.
My mom benefited from all this just two weeks before she passed on at age 92. It was clear that bodily death was on the horizon so I reminded her to stay alert for invitations to interact via SoulPhone technology. (We had talked about this for 7 years so she was very familiar with the project.) In a feeble voice, she said, ‘I’ll do my best to do my part when I’m contacted.’ What a wonderful way to say ‘see you later’ since she KNEW that life after death was real and we would be in touch soon.
As discussed in Anticipated SoulPhone Devices, the following levels of technology are envisioned to communicate with postmaterial: (a) family and friends, and (b) scientists, educators, spiritual teachers, true leaders, and others who want to help people and earth.
- SoulSwitch: This binary device provides Yes / No answers from postmaterial persons. This is not planned to be a service or take home product. Rather, it will be a component of the SoulKeyboard.
- SoulKeyboard: This technology will enable texting and typing with postmaterial persons. Initially, it will probably be a service until all security and performance details are in place.
- SoulAudio: This service and device is expected to allow speaking with postmaterial loved ones and luminaries.
- SoulVideo: As with Zoom, Facetime, Skype, and other video-conferencing services, this level of technology is anticipated to provide seeing and hearing those in the next phase of life.
Suggested action steps . . .
- Visit the SoulPhone.org site and learn more about this life- and planet-changing project
- Tell others about it via social media, groups, and every way you can
- Think about which postmaterial loved ones you would like to contact and what you want to communicate to them
Visit the SoulPhone.org website for free videos, newsletters, and information. To learn more, see articles:
#35 The SoulPhone Project
#44 SoulPhone Project Updates
Key #16: Focus on Evidence-Based Information
This key has been partially addressed, but repetition is the essence of learning. As discussed, a certain amount of grieving for a while is natural when a dear one passes on. However, some people get stuck in severe grief for many years or even the remainder of their earthly lives. (Then, after they change worlds, they remember the big picture of life and realize how needless their fears and suffering were.)
Replacing fear-based misinformation with evidence-based information assists your journey FROM deeply grieving TO brightly shining. (Evidence for each point below is available in the listed articles.)
Fear #1: Bodily death is the end of life.
Reality: Your life-force / energy – and that of your loved ones – existed before human birth and continues after death of the earthly form.
Evidence: articles #60, and #115 that discuss scientific, clinical, and experiential evidence for life after death; and The Afterlife Evidence, Greater Reality Living, and Soul Proof books
Fear #2: You’ll never again see loved ones who have passed on.
Reality: Wonderful and very real contacts with postmaterial loved ones can continue while you are on earth AND after you pass on.
Evidence: article about scientific evidence for postmaterial communication, #6 Evidential Mediums, #9 Visiting with ‘Departed’ Loved Ones Now, #28 Afterlife Contacts; and The Afterlife Experiments book by Gary E. Schwartz PhD
Fear #3: Your loved ones might end up in a fiery eternal hell because ___. (Fill in the blank with your needless concerns, for example, they passed on by suicide, weren’t baptized, were in the wrong religion, weren’t ‘saved’, sinned too much, didn’t attend church, etc.)
Reality: G.O.D. / Higher Intelligence is The Source and Repository of all love, peace, and understanding. You – and your loved ones – are integral, infinite, eternal and beloved parts of All That Is now and always. As such, the above fears are clearly without basis . . . how could you ever truly be separate from true nature? (You may think you are, but can awaken to ‘who you really are and Who walks beside you always’ whenever you are ready.) Consider Biblical parables about Jesus saving the one lost sheep and the prodigal son being welcomed home. Also, remember that human ways (lack of compassion, judgement, and punishment) aren’t Divine ways.
Evidence: #13 Nature of Creator, #15 The Nature of Humans, #16 Evidence-Based Spiritual Teachings, #71 Ask Your Soul, Angels, and The Light, #73 Angels, #107 The Afterlife, #42 What Is ‘the Afterlife’ Like for Evil-Doers? and #83 Am I a Christian?
Fear #4: You won’t be able to survive being away from your loved ones. Further, you have no control over lapsing into severe depression, anxiety, illness, and desiring to die.
Reality: You have much more wisdom, power, and control than you know. Your church and some people might have told you that you are, by nature, a weak, worthless, and lowly sinner. But now you know those were attempts to control you and possibly take your money.
Yes, it can feel very tough after big changes such as a loved one passing on. However, the Greater Reality Healing Program and other resources can help immensely. Many loving people and wise teachers can help you get through what seems like your dark night of the soul. In addition, you are lovingly assisted by angels, guides, master teachers, and The Light. Finally, you and your loved one may actually be together right now in another space-time slice of life.
Evidence: much of the information and resources in Keys #1 – 15
Fear #5: God took my loved one away . . .
Reality: Your loved ones, hopefully in alignment with their spiritual support team and The Light, chose their timing and means of changing worlds. That was not a unilateral decision by a huge dictator in the sky, nor does any such deity exist. Major events are often pre-planned by you and your soulmates who serve as cast members in this earthly play.
Evidence: articles the Nature of G.O.D., #25 Pre-Birth Planning, #68 Big Picture of Life, #78 Why Did God Take My Loved One? and #82 Journeying FROM Deeply Grieving TO Brightly Shining
Fear #6: It’s my fault that my loved one passed on; if only I would have _____. (fill in the blank with what you think you could or should have done to prevent it)
Reality and Evidence: See #5 above.
Fear #7: My life will never be happy and peaceful again. My relationships will suffer and may end. I need alcohol and drugs to block the pain and feel good.
Reality: Whether or not that happens depends upon your predominant thoughts, words, and actions that create the quality of your life. You can always decide – no matter what is happening to or around you – to focus on higher energy feelings and actions based on love, peace, joy, gratitude, compassion, enthusiasm, and enlightenment. Many people have done this and you can too.
Evidence: article When a Child Changes Worlds, #3 When a Loved One’s Earthly Body Dies, #19 ‘The Great News’, #62 I’ll Still Be Sad, But Not As Much, and #64 Drugs, Alcohol, and Greater Reality Living
Again, I hope you will rely more on evidence-based information versus fear-based misinformation. What a difference it makes in every area of life, especially when grieving about the bodily death of loved ones and other big changes.
Suggested action steps . . .
- Review the most common fears and see which ones you could release and heal
- Use audio programs to help with this, for example, Holistic Breathing or Ask Your Soul
- Update your evidence-based knowledge about the reality by reading articles and books
Key #17: Enjoy Relationships with Your ‘Departed’ Loved Ones NOW
As you now know very well, your loved ones who graduated from earth-school didn’t really die. (Only their no-longer-needed earth suits did. In the grand scheme of things, those are as inconsequential as a childhood coat.) What’s more, your postmaterial loved ones aren’t a zillion quadrillion miles away in the sky somewhere. (Again, erroneous teachings from that era aptly named the Dark Ages.)
The life-force of your beloved PMPs is at a different frequency now. While on earth, their energy had to operate at lower and slower vibrations. That allowed them to benefit from the illusion that they are solid, separate, and would die. Benefit? Yes, temporarily believing these falsehoods caused them to struggle and suffer. And that, in turn, triggered opportunities to search for evidence-based information about this earthly experience. Those illusions also gave them a chance to listen to and trust their inner wisdom that understands the big picture of life.
Pretending for a while to be ‘just human’ also can launch adventures, enjoyment, and service to others. (I italicized the word ‘can’ because it’s a choice, isn’t it? You can realize, as Helen Keller put it, that this earthly experience is a daring adventure. Or you can spend the remainder of your years on earth seeking pity and feeling like a helpless victim.)
After your loved ones dropped their limiting earthly bodies, the part of their consciousness manifesting in this earthly experience was freed up. Their energy became more expansive and operated at higher and faster levels. Some humans can’t detect those finer frequencies yet so they falsely conclude that their loved ones are gone. Fortunately, more people can now better sense their beloved PMPs because of evidence-based information about the nature of reality and holistic resources.
In addition, it’s no longer so critical for humans to perceive only what is necessary for survival. While discussing this, Eben Alexander MD and I agreed that about 90% of the brain’s job is to filter out nonessential stimuli. In cave-people times, every day was a struggle due to disease, starvation, and attack by other humans and beasts. People whose sense organs best detected threats survived and, thus, passed on those genes.
In 2025, however, many people don’t have to contend with these daily threats. (There are different sources of stress now, but not as much threat to survival.) More people are spending time, energy, and money to expand their senses and enjoy all the benefits therein.
Many people have reported spontaneous afterlife contacts in which they sense, while awake or dreaming, their postmaterial loved ones. Note: The first term used by Guggenheim and others for this category of afterlife evidence was after-death communication (ADC). However . . .
- The term ‘death’ is a misnomer since no one really dies. Further, ‘death’ is strongly anchored to inaccurate connotations of ‘an end’ and ‘separation’. As such, I propose shifting from ‘after-death’ to ‘afterlife’.
- I use the term ‘contact’ because not all afterlife visits involve communication per se. For example, some people report very meaningful dreams in which they see PMPs who look younger, healthier, and happier.However, ‘the dreamers’ are not aware of any spoken or telepathic messages.
- In addition, I would think that ‘contact’ is more easily translatable so people worldwide can maintain connections with their loved ones.
It’s important to use terms that reflect contemporary understandings even if that requires learning new ones. For these reasons, I use the term afterlife contacts (ALC) instead of after-death communication (ADC).
Raymond Moody MD, PhD says that afterlife contacts have been experienced by about 25% of the general population, 66% of widows and widowers, and 75% of parents with children who passed on. However, I’ve asked thousands of parents if they have received one or more meaningful ALCs; invariably, nearly every hand goes up.
ALCs can involve the usual senses or more ethereal and subtle ones. You may notice electronic devices malfunctioning, for example, lights flickering on and off. You may suddenly feel their presence or have a ‘knowing’ that they are very near. While thinking of them, a favorite song or one with meaningful lyrics plays on the radio. Those ‘in spirit’ are extremely creative and resourceful when making their presence known. The Shining Light Parents Speak book has a chapter full of signs and visits by ‘children’ who changed worlds.
Shared and evidential ALCs indicate that these are not always imaginary or wishful thinking. See article to learn more about signs and visits from loved ones who have transitioned from earth. These contacts are termed ‘spontaneous’ because there doesn’t seem to be any control about how and when they occur. However, as discussed in article that’s not actually true. There are a number of tried and true ways to increase the quality and frequency of PMP contacts.
Until SoulPhone technology provides better ways, four facilitated methods might help you detect the presence of your dear ones . . .
a. Afterlife Contact Technique (article )
b. Sessions with evidential mediums (article )
c. Induced ADC technique as taught by Alan Botkin PsyD(Induced-ADC.com)
d. Mirror gazing / psychomanteum technique as reintroduced by Dr. Raymond Moody.(This approach was used by various cultures since ancient Greece.) To learn more, see the Gaia article Contacting the Dead Through Psychomanteum Mirror Gazing.
Electronic Voice Phenomena (EVP) and Instrumental Transcommunication (ITC) devices have provided some audio and visual contact with PMPs. However, these approaches sometimes / often produce unintelligible audios and vague images. Further, the results can be dependent on the experimenter and conditions. To learn more, see article
Perceiving your postmaterial loved ones may be easier than you think. When I facilitate Afterlife Contact sessions, nearly 75% of participants report one or more meaningful experiences the first time they try it. Visiting with your loved ones in the next phase of life is similar to setting up visits with earthly family and friends. For example, it helps to invite them on a specific date and time. Whether you believe in life after death or not, talk to them as though they really are present.
Just one sign or contact from loved ones can greatly decrease your sadness and increase your certainty that they are alive and well. After that, it can feel more like they are living across the globe; you won’t see them for a while, but you KNOW you will again someday. With the above approaches for now, and SoulPhone technology in the future, you can more clearly send and receive contacts.
Suggested action steps . . .
- Read article to learn practical tips for increasing the quality of relationships with postmaterial people or pets
- Use one or more of the four ways to sense them
- Experience the ‘Afterlife Contact’ technique with your small group and compare notes afterwards
To improve contact with postmaterial loved ones, people and pets, see articles . . .
#6 Evidential Mediums
#9 Visit with Your ‘Departed’ Loved Ones NOW
#22 When Your Pet Transitions from Earth
#28 Afterlife Contacts
#39 In Honor of Lila the Cat
#106 Comparison of the SoulPhone Project and Instrumental Transcommunication.
Key #18: Learn and Benefit from ‘The Eight Developments’
These are magnificently comforting, informative, inspiring, and empowering. A tipping point for personal and global peace and wellness is now practically obtainable. This ‘heaven on earth’ level of living can be reached more quickly and easily than you might imagine. To learn more about exciting collaboration, see article Eight Developments for Widespread Conscious Living Now. (There’s too much important information to share in this article.)
Resources
This program can help you journey FROM deeply grieving TO brightly shining. It provides a higher-energy path to follow when you face big changes and challenges. I encourage you to use it consistently over time so you benefit as much as possible.
Use this program for just 90 days to notice the difference. Evidence-based information and holistic resources to assist your journey include:
* GRI Library to read recommended free articles
* GRI Library to hear interviews with afterlife and optimal living experts
* GRI Library and SoulPhone.org to sign up for free monthly newsletters
* My FREE audio programs, e-books, and documentary film at GRI Library
* Brian Smith’s Grief2Growth.com for those seeking a higher path to handling grief.
* Books by Gary E. Schwartz PhD available on Amazon.
* HelpingParentsHeal.org with Shining Light Resources for parents and family members with a child who changed worlds.
Summary
To fully benefit from the HEALING part of the Greater Reality Healing, Living & Helping Program . . .
1. Read this article Greater Reality HEALING again and take action steps.Share and discuss this information with others to help them and more deeply internalize it.
2. Watch videos at Greater Reality HEALING (in the GRI Library, then top tab Greater Reality Program, then subtab Greater Reality HEALING.
3. Attend free Greater Reality Healing, Living & Helping Program online meetings:
4. Attend in-person local groups where people can discuss and implement this program with others in their community. These will start forming in 2026.
Note: Existing grief groups are also welcome to use all or part of this approach to handling big changes.
Thank you for telling others about this article! Your life, and that of others around you, will be more enriched when you:
- read the article again so you really know it.
- discuss with close family and friends to more deeply internalize it.
- take action steps that seem right for you.
- share it with others via social media, discussion groups, and other ways.
Hugs, love, blessings, and let it shine!
Mark
Mark Pitstick MA, DC
– author, lecturer, counselor, and holistic chiropractic physician
– spokesperson, researcher, and strategic planner for SoulPhone Project
– founder of ‘Greater Reality Healing, Living & Helping Program’
GRI Library SoulPhone.org GreaterRealityProgram.com
University-based research has now scientifically proven that life continues after bodily death. The SoulPhone Project will enable communication with postmaterial (so-called “deceased”) loved ones and luminaries who want to help us heal our world. How does this project, The Great News, and The 8 Developments affect the way you live and treat others and our planet? (To learn more, see articles 19, and 125 in the GRI Library)
Dr. Pitstick is a master’s clinical psychologist, holistic chiropractic physician, and clinical nutritionist. He has also helped others in pastoral counseling and suicide prevention / education settings. His goal is to help you know and show that this earthly experience is a totally safe, meaningful, and magnificent adventure amidst eternity.
To learn more about the Greater Reality Healing, Living, and Helping Program, visit the ‘Greater Reality Programs’ top tab at GRI Library and SoulPhone.org. Also see articles 72, 82, 119, and 125 at GRI Library.
GRI Library provides many FREE resources:
- 8 e-books Radiant Wellness, Soul Proof, The Eleven Questions, Greater Reality Living, The Big Picture of Life, The Afterlife Evidence, Ask the Soul Doctor, and Shining Light Parents Speak
- 10 audio programs Holistic Breathing; Afterlife Contact; Ask Your Soul, Angels, and The Light; Pre-Birth Planning; Identify and Fulfill Your Purposes AND Enjoy Your Greatest Life; Your Life Review; Past Life Regression and more
- 4 audio books (Greater Reality Living, Soul Proof, Radiant Wellness, and Shining Light Parents Speak; we don’t have control over the others)
- Soul Proof documentary film
- 132 Articles (as of 8/1/25) answering the most commonly asked questions and providing holistic solutions for your toughest challenges
- 25 Radio Shows: interviews with experts on consciousness, afterlife, and creating an optimal earthly experience. These include Wayne Dyer, Brian Weiss, Anita Moorjani, Raymond Moody, Michael Newton, Caroline Myss, and others.
- 27 Videos on different pages
- monthly newsletters (sign-up at bottom of com and SoulPhone.org)
In lieu of payment, he asks that you: (1) fully use and appreciate the products, (2) share them with others, and (3) help others in ways you feel called.
The following are also available for a fee:
- 8 printed books Radiant Wellness, Soul Proof, The Eleven Questions, Greater Reality Living, The Big Picture of Life, The Afterlife Evidence, Ask the Soul Doctor, and Shining Light Parents Speak
- Coaching / Counseling Sessions with Dr. Pitstick by Zoom to gain answers to your biggest questions and holistic solutions to your toughest challenges.
Note: This article is intended as a reference source, not to replace professional treatment for physical, emotional, or mental problems. The author disclaims any liability arising directly or indirectly from the voluntary use of action steps discussed in article.
Dr. Pitstick created this article while ‘wearing the hat’ of a clinician, counselor, and educator. His statements are based upon some scientific research; much clinical and experiential evidence; his personal experiences; and best current understandings. This article does not reflect his role in the SoulPhone Project since that requires scientific data for all statements.
